They tell us that growing up is supposed to lead to something better. Parents and teachers make it seem like this whole life thing should come naturally. For me life and all the changes I've been through can feel like a tidal wave pulling me away from the safety of the beach. I get so stressed. I don't know how you're supposed to juggle school and family, friends and relationships. I don't know how you're supposed to trust anyone to keep their word when people lie for silly reasons and time can turn love into hate. Someday I'm going to have died. I don't want to focus on dying or being dead. I just want you to take in the fact that both you and I will have died someday. Sometimes that scares me. Right now I think it's a kind of beautiful thought. No I don't want to die but I think if others keep having experiences then the meaning in life never really goes away. In a way death gives my life more meaning. It drives me to want to live today. Everyday is a battle for anyone who tries to accomplish anything. Next year I am determined to win first place at my state's debate tournament. In ten years I will be a published novelist. Within the next thousand years I will in all probability have been completely consumed by the world around me. Little bits of me will be in soil and trees and babies and other dead things. This isn't bad. The point of life is to enjoy the experience of living. You have to try and go after what you want but you also need to try and be happy with what you have. Entropy eats away at everything but chances are you can hold a lot of the stuff you care about together until you die. To summarize just try to chill out. Life gets better and then it gets worse and that pattern pretty much never stops. In the end I believe it's worth it. This is Matthew J. Gleason reporting from the wastelands.
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